Friday, November 13, 2009

Injustice for Children

Our firend Tracie wrote a painful article


http://tracieloux.wordpress.com/2009/11/13/i-cant-fix-this/




I sure understand the anger. I think the thing that helped me the most was at Lakeland with an autistic girl who was demonized. As I carried her through the prayer line (kicking, screaming, biting and trying to choke everyone) it was an ordeal. By the time I was done, I hadnt realized how intense it was, and I staggered around for a bit trying to collect myself. I was so angry. I was so painfully connected to the injustice of a child who did absolutely nothing to deserve any of this, and yet was so bound and hurt and oppressed, and seemingly powerless.


I was very upset and confused. And then things got very clear. I saw a vision and I was standing in a great big circle of people. In the middle of the circle was Yeshua, Michael, and Lucifer. Lucifer was reduced to kneeling in front of Messiah, and confessing the reality of Lordship. And as he did, Yeshua was somehow looking at everyone. I was standing next to this girl, and both Yeshua and Lucifer were both connecting with her. Yeshua was executing Judgement on Lucifer for bring sin and destruction, and oppressing this child. Every ittle experience of hers, no matter how subtle or misunderstood, was made clear. Every bit of pain she ever had in her life was being laid bare, and placed on the source of her suffering, namely the enemy.


As Yeshua continued, it was obvious that as He was judging satan, everyone was experiencing this in a very personal way. He was reconciling things, and bringing justice, in a far deeper, and far more detail way than humanly possible. And to be sure, the corresponding deposits and corrections He made on behalf of everyone far outweighed even the most seemingly hurtful and horrid experiences they had. I believe they all would say that it was actually worth it, not just simply worth it, but that literally it was made far more in their favor in that time then anyone can conceive of. It was so tangible I think we need new bodies and minds just to endure the outpouring of Justice and Correction that will occur.


This isnt PollyAnna. I know it is unfair, and I know it is wrong. But I also know now, that this short time, with so much confusion and apparent injustice, is not only fleeting, it is a lie. We are tempted to feel so bad about it now, and yet it will seem so distant and insignificant when eternity is made present to our hearts.


Poor Emma now. It is unfair. But might we end up being provoked by the majesty and beauty she carries when Justice is made final? Perhaps that might help me let go of some of it, and Dear God please give us all Grace to let out the rest....

Thursday, October 01, 2009

Where does it all go???

Im struggling with the reality that Im not working much, yet it seems like I have no time... Nothing significant is getting done. Im confused...

Another piece of reality that is becoming clear is the nature of the curse of fallen man. The other day, I stopped whatever it was I was dong, sat down on the floor, and spent a few minutes wth Havah. It isnt like Havah doesnt just walk around and get attention from any of us, but I remember clearly having to do something, and making a happy detour. As she turned around, and slowly backed into my lap, talking about something while waving a sippy cup around, I had this realization.

This was what it was like in the Garden. Eden I mean. Admah didnt have to go work at something away from his family. He wasnt under any pressure to go "do" anything. There wasnt a prevailing concern about bills, a house, or anything else.

It isnt that he didnt work. They all did. But the work wasnt tied to their security, safety, or provision. Work was as much an outlet for creativity as anything else. I doubt seriously we would recognize it. What an unbelivable transition Adam and Eve had to make as they left Eden.

It is so precious to be at home right now. To be with Judah and Israel when they are at my house is so special. So much is changing with them, and it is so important to be with them, and especially to simply enjoy them. Havah is so special as well. In fact in my heart, it is even more special to see Havah wth her sisters. She brightens up even more than normal, and the interaction is so special.

Im starting to panic again. I go through cycles of confusion, as well as fear. If I was objective, I would probably be out trying to work 3 jobs, which wouldnt do enough to get us out of our hole yet. There is a part of me that would rather go down in flames than not see my kids. I have such a short window with the oldest right now, and I dont know what to do. But I realize that is part of being in a fallen world. It wasnt supposed to be this way, Im not really designed to understand or know all this. I am supposed to trust, obey, walk forward. My wife is such an inspirationw hen she says "Im committed not to worry". Im trying too...

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Pieces Missing....

I get Danie and Havah tomorrow....

It has been a long 7 days. And it has showed me some stuff...

1. I remember being very alone. Im 39+ years old now. I had been single for 2 years as an adult before I was married. Then I had a nightmare for 4 years punctuated by incredible blessings with the birth of my Israel and Judah. Then I had a really long period of time (8+ years) where I was single. It is hard ot be signle for many, and it was hard for me. Just being single has its challenges. My biggest problem is staying active and engaged. I simply just back down, and tune out. I have experienced the reality as well that being married to a broken person, as well as being very boken myself, is a nightmare almost, if not worse than, being single. However, I need to remember how hard it can be to be single as an adult, especially someone in their 30s. Just a reminder to me to make sure to reach out and bring those single folks in my life around as much as I can. We all need family in one form or another.

2. I remember being overwhelmed with my kids. As a single person dealing with my own issues, having kids on top was such a welcome focus. It interrupted my own dull world, and my own dead space. But it was also overwhelming. Israel and Judah are such blessings. As they have gotten older, it has become easier and easier to parent them. Aside from all my failings, an poor judgment as a parent, the joy of them overwhelms all other things. However, 4-5 years ago, I was drowning. I didnt even realize it. Being a parent is hard sometimes, being a single parent can feel like swimming with handcuffs. It is worth it, but can be very trying. Dont forget the single parents around you. Connect wth them, especially the ones that are the main parent, or the only one. Visit if you can, or have them over, or get them a break.

3. What a joy babies are. Havah is about ready to enter the toddler stage. Its a fun, but trying time. She seems to have taken on some of her mothers headstrong, willful personality traits (THAT WAS A JOKE PEOPLE). That makes it more challenging, yet she also seems ot have taken on some of the fun, silly aspects of her older siblings. But even without that, when a baby is around, things are always brought down to mroe simple levels, and everything seems like th efirst time. Opening a cupboard, banging a stick, saying something funny, even walking into a room with a bby who knows you can make them smile. The noises that babies make are unique, and when they are gone, the lack of theose noises somehow make things seem much nore dead.

4. What a joy my big girls are. It is becoming a lot of fun being with Israel. She is such a dear person to me. Sitting with her, listening to her, trying to think about the situations she is talking about, and how she is working through them. It is all so neat. I had no idea this would be so fun. Israel being such a great and sincere kid makes it much easier of course. I have joked for years about teenage years coming, but honestly, they might be one of my favorite seasons so far. When Isael was little, she was like music, walking around in and around my life. But there was a lot of turmoil too, lots of pain, and lots of fear. Now, watching her, and learning how to be with her as a woman, all that music has changed into a different song that is much sweeter, and much richer than I ever could imagine.

Judah is still like a walking party. Her brain goes so fast! And she has retaind one of the most precious aspects of her personality, the ability to get her sister and I laughing. She spazzed out the other day at the Post Office. She gets goin on something, and as much as Israel tries to act liek she is bothered, and as much as I try to keep up with her, at some point she is fully committed ot her own silliness that Israel starts laughing and egging her on, and I play the role of patronizing father trying to "bring her back to reality". Judah is also such a deep thinker. And she is so tenacious. And then just when I hit my limit, these beautifulm compassionaite, sincere feelings and thoughts being to come out of her, and you realize there are layers and layers to this girl/woman that are still coming forward.

5. Of course, what a joy Danielle is. I am experiencing the Proverb "He who finds a wife finds a good thing". My bet is, considering the Proverbs about nagging wives and women trouble, it is probably translated better "He who finds a good wife, finds a treasure". This isso clear to me and those around me. As Judah said "Dad, I dont mean to be offensive, but Danie is kind of the glue that holds us all together. When she is hear, the Living Room doesnt look like this". As she said it, she was pushing up against me trying to act out in the physical what she was saying, wrapping herself around me and trying to be like the "glue" around bircks in a wall.

Danie is my best friend, and after 3-4 years together, 1 baby, an ex-wife, and 2 pre teens, a corss country move, and financial trouble, still hanging with me and making me a better man. I enjoy her as much as I like her, and this time apart only proves to me how important she is.

6. Im not as dysfunctional as I was. WhenDanie would leave, for a few days before, I would get grumpy and frustrated. In reality I was reliving the tyranny of being alone, and even left alone. I would shut down, not go out of the house much, kind of regressing. Each time she would leave, Iw ould do a little better. This time, it hasnt been a strain at all except for the celar reality of missing her. Im still growing a lot, and this is proof.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

So why is this so shocking????




Danielle sent me a picture she found the other day on a website about dairy consumption (I think). Anyhow it is a cute picture, but also a provocative one. I realize as I look at it, it would cause shock or prurient interest in certain people, and I realize that is a real problem.

Why?

Im not saying the female body isnt beautiful. But I am concerned with how womens bodies, their femininity, and the concept of breast feeding is so sexualized. Thats a terrible thing. We reduce women to no more than objects when we sexualize them, and attach our own needs and trauma to them.

Think about it. For EVER, women have fed their own children, and the survival rate of humans has continued ot grow faster than the death rate. And then businesses got into the food chain, and started manipulating women to do things other than nurture and care for their children. Im not judging the women who make these decisions, only the results.

You take a child who WANTS to breast feed (ever seen one? I had 3), and withhold it for convenience sake, or the myth that it isnt "nutritious" enough. The child would have suckled anyhow. Then you take that same child and tell them later "Those are sex object. Dont look, dont touch" Fair enough, because we wear clothes etc... So men get an image of mystery tied to their need, and women get a sense of disconnection from theirs.

But then they see porn. Men react, and become lustful, and objectifying. Women become insecure, and confused.

It goes way weirder than that, but Im just talking off the top of my head.

Im not advocating people just unclothe or expose themselves without regard. My wife is very modest about breast feeding, yet she shouldnt be objectified for having breasts, nor should she feel insecure of bothered by her own body (she doesnt, and neither do I!). I just think there are connections with how we treat women, how we then treat their bodies and the wonderful gifts and roles they have, and turn them into awful things instead of beautiful ones.

Lets repent.....

Thursday, June 11, 2009

My friends next home...

I have a few new friends, ones I enjoy talking with, tickling, hanging upside down, and trying to talk with. Especially Houdini.

They all used to live far away, but some other firends went and got them, and took them into their own crowded house. The only way to describe it is the term "delivered".

This is where they were headed. The only term I can think of for the people that go here is "Angels". Im feeling so pissed off I dont have a million dollars right now. Im angry and hurt and cofused about how this happens, and Im afriad of finding out the reality.

http://www.worldnextdoor.org/2009/04/romaniv-boys-orphanage/

Saturday, June 06, 2009

Jesus is my Friend

Fantastic blog post to You Tube and then I saw all these different remixes. I like the Acid Trip one....

Normal



Metal



Acid Trip

Monday, June 01, 2009

Goodbye George Tiller....

I cant say I will miss you. You were a murderer, and guilty of not only killing, but helping people kill. You reapd what you sowed, except that you probably should have been dismembered and burned with saline before you actually died. Perhaps that was mercy. I sure hope by some miracle you were able to reconcile with forgiveness and escape the tormen you were headed to in those last moments.

While I dont participate in modern Institutional Christianity, I cannot help but be astounded at the reality that some organization affiliated in some way with Christ would EVER allow a man like that inside their building. It is one thing if a person who dosnt claim to be a follower does this kid of thing, that isto be understood. But as soon as you claim to be a follower of Christ, and then explicitly do things like murder, and facilitate murder, you should be removed and never allowed back until you have clearly turned.

I hurt for the family of this man, wether they supported him in his work or not. He supported his family with death, but I dont know their positions on it. I can only hope that in Gods inifinte wisdom and love something good comes out of this.

Im not sure if I condone or condem the shooter. I cannot say I feel bad this man is dead. I dont think it will stop abortions, even at his facility. But I cannot deny the reality that in the Tanakh, God directed his people to do similar things to similar people, and to disobey was sin. The whole God who changes not problem arises as well, so I cannot really say what happenned was wrong.

However, I cannot condone it easily either, as vengence isnt ours, even on behalf of the babies. Unless God directs us, and that opens up a can of worms I cannot bear to deal with.

I know this, I would have hoped and loved to have seen this man repent, and turn away from this. I wished he could have been truly saved from this. Im pro-life, but Im not a pacifist nor am I a viglante. Im a follower of Christ, and Christ loved that man, and died for him and desired earnestly that George Tiller would have had eternal fellowship with Yahweh in all pleasure and fulfillment. He wanted hime to be forgivedn, and Im confident strove with all his power to bing that man into freedom.

The main difference between George Tiller and Christ is Christ died of his own choice for what he believed, while George Tiller killed others by his own choice for what he believed.

Thursday, May 07, 2009

I love my wife and family

Every so often, I get all teary when I think about my family.

My wife is the greatest. She is hosting people at our hous this week, and having a meeting today and another on Saturday about health, and nurtition. What most people dont realize is she has been spending tons of time doing research, and thinking about many of our friend with either illness or personal struggle, and thinking and praying about ways to help them. Almost every day recently she is learning something profound about this topic, and I just wish I had the resources to let her go at this much more.

I wish we had a bigger house! She loves having people over, and loves having htem stay. She organizes all of it, plans it, sets things up, gets rooms ready, sheets, food, all the stuff. She is so good at it it all looks normal, but I see behind the scenes.

Since starting to help at PureHEart, things have gotten moreunstable lately. There are a lot of dynamics thathappen whn you engage helping people get healed. we are both stumbling around trying to figure things out, and she is so patient and forgiving when I hit my own personal walls with patience or frustration.

Israel is so much fun to be with, and being next ot her as she grows into her life is becomign fascinating. I forgot the dynamicism of being almost 14! I wasnt half the person she is at this point. She is pushing herself past her struggles and engaging her heart, and it shows.

Judah is just a jot. In fact, she is outgrowing everything as well! Danie ended up with asweatshirt on today,a nd asked Israel "Is this yours?", the answer "No, thats Judahs!" LOL. Judah and I have been riding bikes a little int he am, and she has been keeping us up to date on her massive listening library of Adventures in Odyssey. Judah has an incredible mind for detail, especialy when it comes to stories or books. We watched the Nanbcy Drew movie last night, and she caught so many things about it it was wild.

Queen Havah "Huckleberry" Henry leads a charmed life. She has quite a voice and a will. She is lots of fun until she isnt, and she is willing to let you knwo she would prefer more FOOD PLEASE NOW. She ADORES Israel and Judah, and scoots around on her butt all over the kitchen taking things out of her cabinet, and leaving htat for something else.

It is so important sometimes, to step back and be thankful, and joyful about what we do have. It has been hard financially (not as hard as most, but hard for us), spiritually and emotionally a little topsy turvy, and yetthe reality is, TODAY, Iam thankful and enjoying my family, and allowing my heart to expand with goodness.

Saturday, May 02, 2009

Great article

http://www.wildfermentation.com/resources.php?page=economics


Some fascinating ideas and concepts becoming quite closer to my heart. As my life and my family change and shift to a different motive and practice for living, these things begin to ring more and more true, not just as principles, but as actual paradigms inherent in Creation. Somehow, these things appeal both to the sentimental (for sure), but also something a little deeper, like a simple "This makes sense" gut level.



"Some version of "caring about the health of the consumer" surely appears in the mission statements of all the major food corporations, including the most egregious violators of the public trust. In other words, it is hard to genuinely care about someone you don't even know. "

"You cannot pay someone to care. You can pay someone to act as if they care; you can pay them to follow meticulous guidelines; but you can't make them really care. "

"An alternative path exists: food should not be primarily a commodity. Food is a gift of God's Good Earth, for which all religious traditions teach gratitude. To subject it to the economic regime of the lowest bidder is to desecrate the gift and insult the Giver. "

"When people ask if they can buy our soda in the future, we usually say, "No, but we'll teach you how to make it." We envision a society where every household has a speciality, be it soda or sauerkraut, soap or stock, bread or soy sauce, that they make in quantities sufficient for five or ten households – precisely the quantity that maximizes efficiency without compromising quality. (It is not much more work to make ten gallons of soda than it is to make one, but to make fifty gallons is an enterprise of an entirely different order.) "

Friday, May 01, 2009

New Boy to play with


One of my sisters-in-love just had a nephew-in-love for me to play with. This kid is big, almost as big as my Judah was when she was born. I mean, hes almost as big as my 1 year old daughter.

Now Avacado and Chuckles have a brother to protect them, so Im going to call him Brother Bruiser. Contrary to previous assumptions, especially those made by Avacado, his name is not Osama Obama Solololololololomon.

They have my wife captive in Cinicinatti, and Im single for the night. No kids, no wife. I dont knwo wht single people do on Fridays, so I might just go to Chipotle and drown my lonliness in a burrito.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Now we know what the Loux family was doing

It took the "so long" to get all the "paperwork" done. Yeah right...

Here is the REAL story....

Monday, April 13, 2009

Im in tears right now

Click Here

This is love and affection.

You know things are changing when...

The Missionaries are giving the marketplace guys money...

However humbling it is currently, it is a worthwhile process we are going through. Last week 3 different families gave money to us, either directly (against our protests until they played the "God told me" card), or sneaky (like leaving it on our porch and running).

Over the past month, there have been a few other familes that have done the same thing. Danie and Ihave hadto come to grips with the fact that w are in the middle of something very dramatic for us. Maybe it is of our own choices and irresponsibility. Maybe it is just life. But I dont beleive either of that.

6 months ago, I was pretty certain I heard YHWH tell me things were going to be a lot different in 6 months, and I heard that when I was talking with Him about work, and my vocation.

I waited to tell Danie, and then we didnt tell a lot of people. We have been doing things that we beleive would help us prepare as best we could, all the while trying to do the things we normally would like my work, and opportunities.

It is now April, and while I cannot say I understand all the things that are happenning, I do beleive we are in the middle of a significant paradigm shift, away from what people consider "the marketplace". I will write more about it, but while I have always been a "marketplace guy", I dont really beleive in the concept. God doesnt look at creation, and see different sectors. But the point was I was clear my focus was in wokring and making income.

I dont think that is any different, as I think everyone is called to that. I dont beleive in support ministry outside some very extreme examples. But I do beleive in the body giving and sharing with each other. I also beleive the end of the "marketplace" is within sight. Things are going to be very diferent 10-15 years from now, and we need to get ahead of the paradigm shift or be caught in the middle of one with some serious crisis.

Sunday, April 05, 2009

Practical Life Saving...

Yesterday I had an experience that when over, scared the crud out of me.

I was in the House of Payer foyer, and turned to look and saw a woman lying on the ground. It urned to ask the people sitting in some charis near here "Is she ok?". They shrugged their shoulders and didnt say anything.

I went over to her, and checked on her. She was unresponsive. Things progressed, and at one point we had a woman unconcious, with a fading pulse, and I couldt tell if she was breathing or not.

Thankfully, things improved, but at one point, it was rather scary. When it was done, and the Paramedics came and stabilized her, and took her away, I began to shake a little. All that adrenaline and intensity had to process out. Then I realized that I was totally unprepared for what had just happenned.

The odd thing is this is the 3rd time this has happenned to me in 3 years. I forgot that until driving home. Each time, the process is the same, and has turned out well. However that had nothing to do with me. Had the situation required me todo anything interventive, there is a good chance these 3 people would have died.

I didnt even know a process of steps. Obviously I checked to see if she was breathing etc... but I didnt know what and how to check someone in this situation.

I did some research, and this is what I found. this isnt meant to be instuctive, only informative. I encourage you to go review First Aid, Red Cross, or anything that will help you understand this process better.

1. What is the situation? For example, if someone has been electrocuted, poisoned, or come under the influenceof something similar (think Carbon Momoxide etc...) you have to determine if it is safe for YOU to proceed.

If it is not safe, you have to evaluate. Can you remove the threat , or not (On coming cars cannot be removed for example). YOu might need to make a veyr serious decision here.

If it is safe to proceed, then review the following.

2. Is the person injured? In my case, I couldnt tell if she was unconcious because of the fall, or fell after. There was no blood, however a broken neck or back wont neccessarily bleed.

If the person appears to be injured in the neck or back, try to progress to the next steps without moving them! Unless their life is in danger, or yours, from something else. If you find the next stpes require action, and you can only do this by moving them, make your best judgement call.

3. ABC: Airway, Breathing, Circulation.

Airway: Check their airway for any obstruction. Vomit, Food, blood etc... If there is obstuction, clear it.

Breathing: Are they breathing? Put your cheek/ear near their mouth/nose and get still and listen. Watch their chest at the same time. If they are breathing at all, check the next step. If they are not (I mean AT ALL), then you need to start rescue breathing. If they are breathing, and are not injured int he neck/back, tilt their head back slightly with your hand under their neck. If they are breathing but injured, monitor their breathing regularly.

Circulation: If they are in fact breathing, check their pulse. I couldnt find one on this girl via the neck, but another fellow found one in her wrist. It was fluctuating. If there is no pulse, rescue breathing and CPR are required. If there is a pulse, stop and evaluate.

If there is no pulse/breathing, the issue of injury and movement are irrelevant. Move them on their back, tilt their head up and start CPR.

At this point, RedCross suggests the following:

If there is no obvious neck/back injury, and they are beathing and circulating, roll them on their side, neck slightly back to clear any fuure airway obstruction, and wait with them for emergency help.


In my case yesterday, the gal was a diabetic. She was essentially in a diabetic coma. However, thankfully she had taken sugar gels right before she had passed out, which was probably why she revived. So I would suggest the following steps:

If the person is stabilized, look for a med id tag on their wrist. If there is one, read it. Look through any id or personal ites. We found her drivers license, and I kept calling her name and telling her to wake up. What I wished I had done was look for any meds. I wouldnt give her any, but I would know if she had any so I could tell EMT about it when they arrive.

I hope that I remember these basics when/if this happens again. It hink Ialso need to stop, take a breath, and command myself to calm down. Th extra 5-10 seconds of doing this could save the person in front of me.

Friday, February 20, 2009

This is awesome

What a commentary on a silly and stupid policy Obama already pulled off...

http://www.cnbc.com/id/15840232?video=1039849853

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Im excited

Things keep occuring at a rapid rate and I dont reallt understand what is goig on. However, this is the kind of folks Im beginning to talk with.

http://www.rawgames.org/splash.html

When the going gets tough, the weird turn pro...

Saturday, January 31, 2009

A new thing....

I woke this am at about 4 and finally connected a few dots together. As I told Danie, who was awake, she told me she had been awake from 1-2 prayingf or God to please tell us and focus us in a direction.

Work has been bad. Real Bad. And God has been telling me about it as it happens. Hard to explain it, but I have been listening and right about things for the last few months about what is going to happen instead of what appears to be happenning.

We are so broke that we had to make some serious hard choices about things. Ive been broke, but not with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.

So when I shared this with Danie, and got her feedback I knew it was the best thing to step into. We are going to start a Raw Food company that will focus on delivering Raw Food components and products to people so the can more easily make Raw Food at home, incorporating much more nutrition into their daily lives.

There are lots of people doing this, but with many different agendas, dogma, and widely varying profit margins. We have a few unique cocepts that should help make this more practical.

And that is the name of our new blog, and our new thing. PracticallyRaw. We will be starting o tblog, having some classes, and all the while facilitating others (and ourselves) to make easier choices towards more raw foods and nutrients.

Anyone interested can email us, and we will have some preliminary web prescence by this week. We will be coming up with approachable RawFood basics, and then slowly expanding as we get our feet going. All prayers are appreciated.

There are also a few other things going on as well, that seem to be interesting. I dont feel free to talk about them, but they compliment this idea and help bring some great food, to great people.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Raw Food Class

There seems to be quite a bit of interest in learning some basics about making Raw Food. Everyone wants to get more nutrition, especially fresh veggies etc... in their diet, but it can be a little intimidating.

While Im certainly not the picture of health and raw foodness, I have learned a lot of little things about making Raw Food that people are asking about. Danille encouraged me to have a little class to help people along the way.

So Monday night (feb 2) we will be having a little event at my house, and we will talk about the different types of Raw Foods, from simple to complex. Then we will look at ways you can make things yourself to include more raw food, as well as doing it less expensively, and with more common tools.

If you want to come, let Danielle know. We are asking for $5 to cover the costs of the food, and I hope to make 3-4 things that you can taste and that should give you and idea of how to go ahead and make it yourself. If there is interest, we can do more of them, with more sophisticated types of foods.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

I love making bread






I got inspiried to make bread. Not sure when. I ALWAYS loved bread. In all its forms. I havent met bread I dont like yet.






But I NEVER baked. Except for PotRoast. Then I thgouth "Why not some Pita". Then Pita was easy. Then I thought "Why not some big boy bread" and then I got messed up.






Im not interested in off the shelf crap. Panera is ok in a pinch, but I want good bread. An in my opinion,t he most authentic bread is naturally levened, i.e. Soudough.






The more sour the better for me. However it isnt about how sour, i is the fact there is only really 3 ingredients in my bread. Flour, Water, and Salt. It levens without heavy spur flavor if I want it to.






I wont go into how I made the starter,but it was easy. Im convinced Ihave true sourdough starter even though I used yeast at one point. I made one with grapes, but in a community with Nazarites, I didnt want them to screw up their vow on my end.






Anyhow, the most success I have had is not with the super sour, San Francisco type bread, although that is like my favorite. It is a whole wheat based bread. I dont knwo why, but Im getting far more achievement in this than I should.






Every loaf I make is better than the last with this bread. I made some Rejuvalac, and kept the sprouted wheat berries, and added them to my bread this time. I also added millet, and polenta (corn grits). In the last pic you can see the grains. Next time Im going to do more than soak. Im going to slightly sprout, then mix it witht he leven to ferment it slightly. The nutrition in this bread is almost unbeatable as far as bread goes. Very bio-available and complex carbohydrates.



Here are pictures. THanks so much to Rchard Lewellen who totally inspiried me and gave me books and ideas. Come over for TOAST!