Why I beleive the Adoption Industry is Human Trafficking Part 3

I did some investigating and found loads of websites of adults against adoption! Wow. Most of these were natural mothers (they prefer to use that term rather than "birth mothers" and I understand why after reading their thoughts), and they honestly feel manipulated into giving up their children by the adoption industry. They actually feel like they were the victims of predatory practices by individuals involved in the business of poaching babies from women for couples who were infertile.


Just the thought of it makes me feel sick. I do NOT believe that is the majority, nor do I believe people I know that have adopted have ever willingly participated in this practice. To be honest, I dont personally know anyone with adopted kids that dont have "natural" children. Im sure there are some, I just havent met them yet.

But there was some interesting points in this. As a person interested in adoption because of a command to work with widows and orphans, when is a child truly an orphan? That was the main crux of the problem as I read it.

Adoption itself is focused on the reality of a child without any parents or "natural" family. The point of it is to walk in Gods heart for people, and people without family are something He doesnt leave alone.

So the real underlying issue is... We should be encouraging women to birth and raise their own babies. We should be facilitating that at every opportunity. I know this already, but reading these articles brought it back in focus. The reality is, helping a single mother raise her own child is the single best thing to do about the issue of Life.

We shouldnt try to sugar coat adoption. Adoption is the last resort. IT is a beautiful thing, however it is a grevious thing. The fact it exists at all is hurtful. We cannot just focus on the reality of wonderful, loving families as if that is the only aspect. There was great injury in the whole process. And God forbid we did "business" with anyone who influences a woman to give up her child for their commission.

This is where I think my heart has gotten to after thinking and feeling my way about this for a long time. Im not for adoption of newborns in most cases:

1. For one, the potential for manipulation of a woman in crisis is high. I think every attempt should be made to help that woman to parent her child, and all efforts should be put there first.

2. As I understand it,we are so desperate for someone not to have an abortion that we push adoption as the alternative. However, we need to understand that the best thing (and the most expensive, difficult, and personally costly thing) we could do is actually help a single mother (think widow here) grow into motherhood fully respected and empowered to live herself,a nd with her child, regardless of any personal faith decisions or values she would embrace past things that endanger the child.

3. Newborns are easier to adopt out than any other child. Almost everyone I know goes after newborns. While some dont get adopted Im sure, the point is that is where the market is.

4. Children a few years old and more are clearly orphans. They have been abandoned. They were the newborns that either didnt get selected, or they were put in situations that didnt work.
I think this is more towards the bottom of the issue for me. The fact that mothers feel manipulated doesnt mean they were. Hard to say, but true. Im sure some WERE. That is sick, and to stand before God with that makes me shudder. But painting the whole industry with a broad brush and claiming all of it is wrong based on the pain and true anguish of a group isnt correct.

However, take their cries, and listen. Listen to the reality that there is a deeper issue even underneath adoption. It is the cry of a (mostly young) woman, caught in a snare. That is the first problem. The baby isnt the problem, the situation of the woman is. If we are to be wild lovers of people, we cannot bypass this part and say that is for someone elses "calling". It is our first one. Then adoption.