Beauty vs. Attractiveness

As I kept thinking after writing the last blog entry, it became more and more obvious to me the distinction between what is beautiful, and what is attractive. some of this is just loose thoughts all mashed together. The basic idea is that beauty isnt attractiveness.

1. Beauty is exisitent wether you noticed it or not, attractiveness is cultivated. God (and God in His creation) is beautiful, even if no one noticed. It would happen all by itself. But you cannot make it better or make it happen. But you could do everything from excercise to surgery to wearing nicer clothes to make your self more attractive.

2. Beauty is an aspect of God, whereas attractiveness is an aspect of humanity.

3. Beauty will draw you to a greater revelation of Beauty Himself. Attraction will draw out your appetite. When you see Beauty, it draws you somewhere, but when you see something attractive, an appetite wakes up inside you, and you want that for yourself. It creates a hunger that can become quite covetous. Beauty will awaken your heart to something that causes you to want to give yourself to it.

4. Beauty is pure, it cannot really be manipulated or created. It seems like it, but as you begin to take it for yourself, it fades, and turns to sinful and ugly things. As you begin to own it, you dissociate yourself from the source of it (God), and it turns into an idolatrous thing. We then use it for ourselves, and it descends into an awful mess.

Attractiveness can be influenced and redirected and used. It is really fallen beauty, and it becomes a vicious cycle. It becomes a possesive thing, and token to barter with. As long as you can figure out what someone wants or needs, you can try to configure yourself to meet that demand, and use it.

5. Beauty is simple. When you see beauty, it is simple, intuitive, and self evident. Attractiveness usually is more complicated, requires maintainance. A simple example is waking up, and seeing your wife, who might claim she has messy hair, and no make up, and yet all you can do is understand her beauty vs. walking down the street and seeing someone all made up desiring attention and influence. While she may be pretty, and she may be attractive, it all comes from effort and effect, not a revelation of a deep love.

The example of your wife is beautiful because you love her, and you see her with love, which brings a true revelation, based on how you know the true person. The lady that is all makde up to look like a porn star is trying to get your attention, and something from you. She is using (and most typically from brokeness and wounds) herself (or himself) to trade for something else.

I am sure there are plenty more ways to describe this. I now realize how I saw beauty, when all I had typically seen was attractiveness. I see that more in the Body now than ever. We use our gifts and talents, and over time we begin to draw people and things to ourselves (all in the name of "ministry" and "Gods work"). We begin to prostitute the beauty that God has placed in us, and trade ot for all sorts of things, but in a subtle way that looks like beauty, but is simply fallen.

A Vision of Belle

During music and prayer last night with TOdd, I kind of went into a really neat vision as I was praying. Its simple, but as I prayed about it at bed, I felt like God shared more with me.

I was praying (like usual) for God to just touch us (corporately) and heal the things that keep us from being who we really are in Him. I have a few people (women) I am praying for and as I prayed I was picturing them in my mind. As I did, it all kind of morphed into a vision.

In this vision, I saw a woman, and she had a basket under her arm, and she was walking through a little town. In the basket was little pita bread like things. And she was handing them out to people.

During this I could hear myself praying still on the mike. I began to cry, because this lady was so sweet, and she was so beautiful. But it wasnt beauty like one would think. She wasnt unattractive, but she wasnt attractive like we typically know it. She was so simple in dress and appearance (I didnt actually see her face), and yet she was so BEAUTIFUL. It was more an emotional response than anything else.

I was praying about how beautiful she was, and realized this was the Bride of Christ. And she was taking bread she had from her house, and walking all over this place, and as she came ot people she gave them this bread. Some people were hungry, and needed it. SOme people didnt need it like that, but the act of giving it to the people that didnt need it physically still impacted them.

And it wasnt a big deal to her. She was just going about her thing, and brought bread to hand out along the way. Although curiously, I had no clue where she was going, and what she had to do. In fact, it didnt seem like there really was anything else to do BUT walk around, and seemingly hand out bread, and seemingly hand out bread.

I realized her name was Belle. And then I realized this was just like Beauty and the Beast (at the beginning). Except in Disney, there is singing and all sorts of melodramatic stuff. And I love that symbolism, but this was so much more profound in its simplicity.

I beleive the name Belle is the word for Beauty or Beautiful in French.

It was so simple, and so profound and so beautiful (the word just keeps coming up). I realized I was receiving the mind and the heart of Jesus for His Bride, I was seeing her as He sees her, and feeling something that He does.

Now this is as important. As I was doing this, Todd was playing this new toy I got for music. He was all over this thing, and I had thought about how delightful it was to just hear Todd playing and being who he is. He is actually very telented, and he was able to combine his drumming skills with this wild ability to pick up melody by ear. And as He did, the anointing was there, and I was able to engage it and begin praying. As I prayed, I was in this vision.

I believe that God was showing me the delight He takes in His Bride, and showing me how beautiful she is to Him. And I also believe that Todd is His Bride, and that as Todd was just going about being himself, he was carrying "bread" (in this case an anointing and Grace from God). And as he did, I was getting impacted, and his daughter Abby was dancing and wiggling all over the prayer room.

I know this is getting long, but try to stay with me here. These are the things I pick up from this:

Much of what I was praying for these women about had to do with healing, physically, emotionally, and mentally, including salvation for my daughters.

We as the Bride of Christ carry the "Bread of Heaven", by definition based on who we have become in Him. And as we do, we hand it out, sometimes willfully, sometime without even realizing it. It is a natural byproduct of who and what we are.

The Bread of Heaven is healing, because it is revelation of God. It is Jesus Christ. We carry Him with us. And our commission on earth is as we go about our things, to hand it out. To the weak and poor, and to the strong and rich.

Another piece is the distinguishing between what is attractive, and what is beautiful. They are very different. It is hard for me to explain it, but Attraction has a lot to do with its ability to draw your attention, and it relies primarially on your response. It isnt sin, but it can become a tool to create it.

But beauty exisits regardless of wether anyone responds to it or not. It is an aspect of God. Wheter you perceive it or not, it is there. And it doesnt create a response in your heart of desire as much as awe. It communicates profoundly, and its main message is itself.

She was beautiful. I didnt even know if she was attractive. I assume she was, but I couldnt get past her beauty to see.

Thats how God sees you.

Make sense?

Hypertension and Raw Food

I dont have much profound to write, but I do have this to share...

Christmas 2004 I came to realize I had VERY high blood pressure. I checked it on a home monitor, and it was 180/100.

Summarialy I went tothe Cardiologist. I knew I had slightly high BP when I was a kid. However just a few years earlier, I would get really tired, and my chest would hurt, and I thought it was congestion. turns out it might have been that high BP!

Anyway, I went on Lisinopril, doubles the dosage until it hit 40mg, then added hydrochlorathiazide (water pill). Finally got my BP down.

Problem was, the side effect of HCT are sun sensitivity. Being a redhead doesnt help either. And the fact that Iw as on 2 meds, and might be permanately was a drag.

Feb of 2005 I went on a fast of raw food for other reasons, but my BP dropped so much I had to cut the Lisinopril in half. But I wasnt able to continue for too long. I lost 20 pounds in a month, and I think that was the primary reason.

In December I decided to do that again, but was only able to continue for about a month. I knew I needed to try again. It is tough, but I know it might help.

Just recently, I was able to try again. I knew I needed to, but just not eating wasnt going to last. I asked God to take me on a fast, both to keep me on it, but also to bring some kind of purpose beyond just myself. Within a few days, he showed me some things about myself, and a few other people to pray for.

Physically, I had maintained some of the weight loss, and had been able to work out with weights. But my doctor took me off HCT, to try and see what would happen. My BP went up 15 points.

I have been on another raw food fast for 6 days. My BP has dropped almost instantly. In fact it might be lower than average. I get a little tired at times.

Prayer was great the first few days, but it is tapering off. But as I see physical imrpovement, it is hard to stay focused on the prayer side. It is more work there than not eating bread! Although I get really bored, and since I love to cook, it will get harder. But I have a free day on Saturday with my kids, so that I can look forward to.

Anyway, the point for me is that it is hard to take care of myself this way, but it is working. Im not trying to give medical advice, but altering my diet radically has radical results. And asking God to bring something to bear more worthwhile than just not eating for health sake really helped. It was so nice of Him! That makes it easier to focus. I hope I can continue for quite a while.