Just because you arent a Jew or a Muslim doesnt mean...

I am realizing something very annoying, and I think detrimental.

The world in general believes that "the West" is Christian. They say this within the context of "instead of a Jew or a Muslim". But it is completely untrue.

I am a christian. Not a very good one, but certainly someone in deep need of Mercy and Grace and I trust only Christ and Christ alone for forgivness and salvation. Not because Im caucasian, not because Im an american, not because Im a westerner.

The problem might also be with the idea of a "Jew". There is a difference (to me) between an Israeli, and a Jew. Israelis live in Israel, or come from there. A Jew is a religious term (again to me). I dont consider someone who goes to temple and fools around with Judaism simply because of a cultural history to be a Jew.

I DO tend to assume people with an Arabic or Persian ancestry to be Muslim unless they tell me otherwise. Again, there is a huge difference between someone who says they are Muslim, and the real people who observe all the tenets of Islam.

Anyhow, I hate the fact that someone assumes my neighbor is a Christian simply because they are American, Western, or White. Or they say they believe in God. It is odd to me. I am a Christian because of WHO I FOLLOW, not where I was born.

Disclaimer

Much alcohol was referred to in previous posts. Although it is mentioned often, in truth I think that is because almost evrything was a perpetual celebration, and many of the things I mentioned were the highlights.

One night Danie and I actually TRIED to get tipsy, and had to work rather hard at it. I dont know that we had a huge tolerance, but we sure are lightweights.

So, just in case there is a little concern out there, we didnt ratchet up our life styles permanately. LOL.

BackHome

We got back Saturday, and spent the next 2 days recovering. I got used to the rocking sensation when going to sleep. I got used to wandering around with nothing to do. It took me about 3 days before I really settled. I could see a 10 day cruise asa little better, as I really did only relax in time ot enjoy a day or 2.

We ordered fresh fruit inthe morning in our cabin. The Pineapple was way better when we hit Mexico. They had saladsand such int he free form dining area, but it would be awfully hard ot eat healthy.

I really reccommend a cruise as a way to go somewhere without massive planning. I look forward to going again as a way to get away with my wife. She is great to travel with,a nd we had a great adventure to get started on our life. What a treat I got with her.

Back at Sea

The next 2 days were just sailing home and relaxing.

Danielle is the only person I have ever met who will get up to go teh bathroom,a nd come back and tell me she just made friends with the nicest girl who was cleaning it, and how wonderful she is and how she is her favorite person (that day). the people that waited on us were so wonderful, both danie and I were a little emotional leaving!

Pras was our dining steward. he is from Indonesia. He might well be the most graceful man I have ever met. His demeanor, his movements, his speech were all so geniune and graceful without being effeminitte (sp?). His names means humble, and it was fitting.

I asked once for Tabasco, and from then on out there was a little gravy boat ofit at my seat every night before I got there. Lots of little things like that was such fun and nice for us.




Evangelina (Vangie) was our drink steward. She was such a bright personality. She called me "Sir Sean" the whole time. She would always see us ans smile and say "Hello Daniel and Sir Sean!". She was from the Phillipines. Danielle loved her so much she would tell me all night how she would just watch her walk a round and talk and smile at everyone. she was the brightest most happy lady int he whole dining area!






Anhar was our dining steward assitant. He was from Bali, and his names mean "River" and "Believers". The guy never stopped laughing and giggling and telling jokes and smiling the whole time. He has worked on 3 "World Trips" that are 3 months long, and one of his customers wason their 20th WorldTrip. Eeesssshh. We have his email, and when he is in Long Beach, we are going to go get him, a nd make him dinner and bring HIM food! He was definitely the most adventurous one, and had lots of stories.



The food was good overall. Some really good things, a few really awful desserts, and the rest nice. I gained 7 pounds, and I cannot see that Daniegained anything at all! The service was great, and I really enjoyed the parade of Baked Alaska. Watching grown people prance around in the dark with flaming cake is worth a lot of money to me.

Puerto Vallarta

This was the best of them all. Nicer city, fun adventure.

We got off the boat, and got on a little speedy boat. We went about 35 mph accross the bay for about 20 minutes, and pulled into a private little cove with some residential houses called Tomatlan. We pulled up right on the shore, and got off.

they put us in a 4x4 unimog that might have seen service in Korea. We packed into the back and went up the hills to a little camp about 2000 feet. The scenery was interesting. We werent in the jungle, but you could see how different it was. It wasnt like California witht he high deserts orevergreens, and notlike the ferns and such up north. vines more than bushes, and cool light green leaves and the air was perfect.

We then mounted mules, and rode up a foot path about 15 minutes. They had to get a bigger mule for me, and he wasnt happy abouot a big yelling red haired ass riding his ass. Then we got off and hiked abouther 10 minutes up a path, and zip lined all the way back.

they dont let you bring cameras, mainly because they want to sell you pictures. but here are some of the other stuff.



We got back soaking wet (We rappelled down a waterfall and then zip lined down a river into a pool). We met a sweet couple that had jsut gotten engaged on the ship, and we took off in a taxi to downtown Puerto Vallarta.

Since we were the old married couple (comparitively speaking) it was even more fun. We got to just simply hang out, and I remember after some daquiris and margaritas carrying on about how to maintain the proper perspective in your small mfg business (he is a budding General Contractor) and then rambling on a bout adoption and the real nature of God and Love. She was a psych major, so I got into some discussion about healing, and then she asked if we were Christians, and then I got lost explaining that while we were, it was all about love and not titles and claims and religion. I hope it helped, but I doubt it.

Mazatlan

This was a fun place. I dont knwo why we dont many pictures.My guess is because the firststop was the BEER FACTORY TOUR. Danie is a beer girl, so I went along to keep her out of trouble.

It was cool seeing how they make 33 million gallons of beer a year. Nature is a trip, and yeast and bacteria were some kind of cosmic joke God played on us. You can make things like pickles,cheese, wine, beer and sourdough breadout of some of it, and yet int he wrong places, a nd the wrong amounts, it can make you really sick.

They took us on a tour of downtown Mazatlan, and our tour guide gave us some ideas of where she goes to eat.

We then took a taxi to the beach, and Danie went parasailing, the only thing my lovely lady said she wanted to do the whole time there. I watched as 3 strange latin men hooked my new bride into a harness, attached it to a parachute at one end, and a boat ont he other, and then I watched her float away. What and odd feeling....



























Here she comes back down.

















Then we went to eat at a local place and had shrimp and marlin empanadas. This was really good. Then back to the ship!!!!

How to pay for your habits...

They had a poker table!! Yeah. It was basic friendlypoker, and thankfully, no one was taking it too seriously. I spent about 10-12 hours the whole week playing poker, which was the only way I was able to make any money back we lost playing Roulette and 2 cardpoker and "fun 21" blackjack (AWFULGAME!!!)

Tthe problem was that I decided to have some fun, and see if I could win a lot of money.So I went to the first game a little intoxiccated, and acted like I had no clue how to play. I misbet intentionally, rambled on about how I had seen this on TV, and Danie even came up and started helping provide the persona with comments like "Honey this is just like when you watch TV" and things like that.She went and got me a drink, but I had forgotten I hadnt told her to make it LOOK like a Rum and Coke, but make it only Coke.

$200 later, I had the shocking realization that no one played well, no one was trying take advantage of me, and I had just wasted a lot of time and money trying to set up these people for the rest of the week!!!

Overall, I won about $400 playing nice and easy the rest of the week, which made up for the first day, and covered out losses having fun in the other partsof the casino. What a riot.

Cabo Wabo Why?

Our Monday was in Cabo San Lucas. Im still not sure why people like this place, and our conclusion is that they must mean away from the beachy areas. We went to a place called "The Office", got margaritas, and sat on the beach. The sand was very granular and unusual, and we spent the next 30 minutes saying "No thank You" at least 30-40 times (no exaggeration).

We decided to leave, walked up the beach, and got to a mall that was around the marina. It had Johnny Rockets, LaCoste, and every other thing you could get in South Orange County. We rambled back via the main drag, and went shopping at the tourist trap right by the docks.

I had a little encounter with a disabled little boy in a wheelchair that left me undone for quite a while. I kept touching him, and when I stopped he would reach out and grab my hand and put it back on his head, and make sounds like he just wanted to be touched. I kept praying for him secretly while Danie negotiated with his miother to buy some things. I was quite disoriented for the next 15 minutes, and later in the ship just had to cry my eyes out. Thankfully, Danie is gentle and patient with a big blubbering fool like me.




This is the famous arch that people go out ot and look at rocks and arches.













This is our boat as we left it for the first time. Due to the problems with the boat, we werelate, and the rough water caused tremendous delays in "tendering" (odd word for getting to the dock).









Anyhow, we got back to the ship, a nd went in the pool and relaxed.

Formal Night

Sunday night was "formal night". I must say Danielle was awfully pretty, and we attracted a lot of attention. As we would pass tables, I would hear "He must be REALLY wealthy", or "What a gorgeous daughter he has, his wife must be a supermodel to make up for him", and "What bad thing did she do in a previous life?". More stories to come....

Highlights

Im simply not getting used to being back. It is a culture shock to have to walk up to a counter and pay for my food, not being able to order 2 entrees and 3 desserts, and not being in a state of semi-drunkenness.

It all started in San Diego on this ship...

As big as it looks, it turns out this is a medium sized ship. There are 10 decks, and we were located right behind the life boats. I wasnt aware that "slightly obstructed view" meant looking at my life raft.

We then had our fire drill. You cannot go out of the harbor without one. This was fun and odd, and we met some silly kids. At this point I engaged parental auto pilot and began to yell at other peoples kids, and ordering them around.












Then came leaving. We wandered around, and got to see the "azipods" work. Thoseare the cool propeller type pods that push the boat. One of our was broken, which meant we went slower the whole trip, which had its own problems. Danie likes to take fancy posed pictures










Then we had a day at sea. We had to figure out how it all worked. I had the odd experience of waking up at 4:30 am the first day, and watching the sun come up in the "Crows Nest", and about the same time the next.

On the Boat

We are arriving in Cabo San Lucas today. I am up again at 4:30. I cannot seem to sleep. I dont know why. You know that feeling when your eyes are tired, and you still cannot sleep? I actually forgot my room number yesterday. I knew where it was, but pretty much walked around in slight dellerium. The great thing is you can only go so far before you get back to the same place.

You would think witht he amount of food and alcohol we ingest daily, sleep would be easy!!! Actually we are doing really well on that. The food the first night was great, and we tried all sorts of things, and left food on the plate and didnt over eat. VERY proud of myself. Last night was "formal night", and weird enough, the food wasnt good. They literally didnt make some of the desserts right, and they were awful. We (I) actually had to tell them because Im sure they didnt taste that before they sent it out.

But aside from that, it is neat. Lots of families. Probably because of the holiday. Unfortunately, when you wake up this early, everything is fairly shut down, so I have been all over this ship. This cruise line really is for slight older folks, however they have this huge progam for kids that seems to be a hit. You can pay all this money to go on a family vacation, to drop your kids off and pick them up at 1am. No kidding. First guy we met was here with his "partner" and they do that with their kids.

Danie of course walks around with me, and everyone stops and stares. It is wild. When we walk around places she gets so much attention. I have always tried to be careful with my eyes, especially when it is obvious a gal is with a guy. No that Im married, it is actually easier. But I am not used to being with someone that gets checked out all the time! LOL. One time at the gym I was going to pee on her in front of everyone to let them know she was with me, but she asked me not to. Anyhow, the consensus is that most people think I am a really wealthy slob, with a trophy wife. I just have to let them think that.

They have poker here. So we cooked up a plan. I acted like a drunk fool (which wasnt hard because melatonin seems to affect me for a LONG time, and no sleep, plus melatonin, plus alcohol, makes me very odd. And she came up and acted all sweet, and tried to encourage me, and I acted like all I ever did is watch TV etc... and mis bet and made obvious errors. I figured I would lose some money, and then get it back later on in the cruise. The problem is, at the end of my plan (she was supposed to bring me a VIRGIN drink) I realized, the players sucked, no one even noticed how bad I was playing except for one guy, and I had just wasted a lot of time and money!!!!! So I have a few chances to get it back.

I miss my kids, so I yell at other peoples kids. Its a habit. During lifeboat drill, a kid next to me was blowing on the recovery whistle. I told them to take that out of their mouth, because they didnt know where that had been. As a parent, habits die hard.

More to come later!!!!

Pray for this man

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15751409/


Now that sounds like the funnest thing ever. Now I really know why I like Kansas City. I beleive this man has a revelation of simple generosity that strikes far deeper than anything I have seen in the Body of Christ. Its funny, but I wondered if he is a Christian! LOL. As I thought about it, I realized that the Love that he practices so far outweighs anyones theology that it is a stupid question. If we recognize Christ by fruit, this man is walking after Christ.

Does anyone care about his position on the Holy Spirit, Eschatology, or membership in a local church?

Not me. I wonder if God gives a rip?

Party Part Deux

California Party was fun. I actually feel more "married" now than I have so far. I realized how much, for me, marriage is something that is recognized by your people, not by the state. It isnt bad, just different. I loved our wedding in Ohio. It was very special to me for many reasons, the first of which it was Danielle's way of expressing herself, and I loved it.

For me, having htese people in my sphere come and recognize it with me, and celebrate it with me, is what cemented the fact I was married. I would feel just as married without the certificate (that we just got in the mail yesterday) now as I would otherwise. I think I am beginning to see a little more underneath some of the comments I made earlier.

Anyhow, when "Colour My World" played (one of my favorites, and what I consider to be one of the best written songs ever), I got to dance with my wife. And I found myself dancing in a group of married people. To my left was Jeff and Renee Hurst, whom I have seen from early marrieds, to first kid, to second kid, to established family unit. And I watched them dance together and love each other and enjoy each other. To my right I saw Ken and Jen Murray. I was there from the forst part, to the wedding, to living behind them and seeing htem get pregnant and their first babay. All the good bad and ugly. I saw Ken dance with his wife, and kiss her, and I felt so proud of him and them both! There were several other couples,a nd I realized a shift had happenned, and I was no among them, a man with a wife, amongst other married people, stopping to take time and simply enjoy being close enough with someone to look them in the eye, and touch bodies, and enjoy the special relationship we have in front of others withouth shame or embarassment.

My father made a toast (I wasnt aware all this was going to happen) and said some wonderful things about Danie. I know my Dad well enough to know he said things about me too, but I didnt hear them. But they love her a lot. And they have tremndous respect and confidence in her. That is something quite new and different!

And then it was load up and come home, where I stayed up most of the night with coughing kids. The reality is right there with the ideal.

We leave for Mexico today. We drive down to San Diego and Oosterdam with all the old folks. I will miss my kids, and be out of my element, but all the while with the woman that I love, and feel more connected to than ever.

Going South

btw... the new version of blogger is available. However its the stupidest process I have ever seen, and after 10 attempts it failed. What a joke.

Anyhow, going on a honeymoon tomorrow. Taking the easy route. Get on a boat and make them wait on me hand and foot. Lay around with our bellies full of meat, drinking copious amounts of overly expensive alcohol, oogling my bride until she cant stand me, and some adventures off the ship in touristy spots (beer factory tour, outdoor adventure tour, parasailing, possibly dune buggy racing) and then come home.

It will be nice to get away. There is no way I could have enjoyed it right after the wedding. I needed to get back into the groove a little bit, and we needed to settle in as a family.

The party is tonight as well for the West Coasters. It changed from a "I just want to have a PA in one corner, flesh food and alcohol in the other, and party til we collapse so I can show off my wife" to my Mom saying "Your dad and I want to help" to "Your Dad has had a few glasses of wine and syas we should..." all the way to I'm sitting in a caterers office, and my Mom is picking out napkin colors, running to BevMo, and Im ordering Roasted Pig for 80.

It should be fun. I have been so blessed by so many people. People driving all the way to Ohio from Kansas just to do flowers, and decorate, and help, and take incredible care of my kids so Danie and I could get a night to ourselves. Jason helping me and driving me all around and making sure I smell good. It makes you realize how impacting small things are. dont wait until someone is in the hospital before your feel its time to help! LOL

Anyhow, We get up Saturday, and drive down to San Diego and leave. I will try and post pictures and such from the boat. I plan to come back 10 pounds heavier, and bloated. Therefore a juice fast is in order for most of December.

This makes more sense to me

http://www.wnd.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=52808

This article says more bluntly and more appropriately what I was feeling about this recent issue of Ted Haggard.

I think putting people in these positions, is dangerous, and ultimately a problem for the Body. As we put people in these situations, we need to share in the failing. They are no different than anyone else, and yet we put them in a position full of stress and false position, and therefore they crack like anyone of us would.

My heart hurts

When I heard this story about Ted Haggard before the weekend, and now I read this, a simple synopsis of his public confession. http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/nation/la-na-haggard6nov06,0,7806096.story?coll=la-home-headlines

The thing that hurswt is how hard it is to be trapped like this. I know first hand what it is like to be so stuck in one part of life, and have other parts operating as if things are fine. It is so confusing to be struggling with things (not just sexual dysfunction) and how it comes and goes seemingly at random.

While I know all the issues about sexual dysfunction, and hasve spent hours talking about the dynamcs of the seemingly worse "same sex" confusion (it isnt worse, only less understood), the reality is that Sunday am my family and I were talking about Saddam Hussein, and how he will be killed for his sin in public. And we talked about sin, and the nature of it. And how guilty I am of many of the same things inside my head, and how I am guilty.

Then we talked about how it is just as evil to do and act in other ways. How directing and leading people to believe that you have to do certain things, or no do certain things, in order for God to Love you or Save you is just as evil as killing people. And thinking about hurting someone is the same as stealing.

We all know this. At least we claim we do. But in reality, when things like this come out (and there will always be more to come), we get shocked.

I wonder how hard it must be to be put in a position of influence like that, and yet still be human. I wonder how much being put in these positions actually facilitates these struggles. I wonder if our need to have people in positions leading and directing, help them occupy a place they shouldnt even have. And all the intensity of that position jsut simple pushes every insecurity and broken place to the surface.

I hurt for this man. I dont know if he is really a liar and a deceiver, or just one of us. I have known and seen much worse behind the scenes, where people intentionally deceive and hurt people without any repentance. And they continue to perpetuate this stuff. At least this man got exposed, and simply was just revealed to be a weak human.

Get thee to a nunnery!!!!!

This is a problem...

Kids grow up, sure. But I wasnt anticipating the reality of them growing up so BIG or so GORGEOUS. And Since I ahve now added 1 more, I have the odd problem of too much of a good thing.

What happenned to CUTE???? Cute grew up, and now I have found a cloistered nunnery in Bavaria that might be a good fit. No Boys, No Fun, and they can sing songs and walk on the grass and wear hats.

Its official

Its offical. At least I think there is little chance of anything happenning that could allow Danie to get out of this mess shes in!

I assumed that I got the good end of the deal, and from what I can tell from her friends and family, I was right. We all knew how nice she is, and how sweet hearted. Thats easy, and takes about 30 seconds. I dont know anyone who doesnt like her, let alone love her (EAT YOUR $%@! HEART OUT). But then, she gets all fancied up, and walks out and you think to yourself "Holy crud, I got this gorgeous woman on my hands and Im a little intimidated!"

I knew she was mighty purty. I even knew she was super purty. But this was way over the top. To be honest, Im glad she is so modest (one of my FAVORITE things about her to be truthful is how she stweards herself and her beauty), because I feel kinda like Moses walking through Egypt with every powerful guy wanting to off me to get her!

Im really grateful for her friends too. They were unbelievably helpful and supportive. I have finally seen some people that have similar status and cache to my own set of friends. I am blown away by the generosity of people, and their sincerity. I highly reccommend Jason as a personal valet, and dancing fool. He helped me get ready, made me smell good, and then started shaking his groove thing when needed.

Thanks so much for all the help to all these people. I dont even recall all of them, but it was great. The best part is coming home, and getting on with life.

BBQ so good it makes you want to...

The phrase I heard is slap your mama. But this is even weirder.

We went to Arthur Bryants. Considered on of the first and most authentic BBQ places in KC, if not the country. Especially for KC BBQ. We even went to the original one, down in the industrial downtown part of KC.

It is a dive. I didnt realize it really would be. We got there, and they gave us some pretty cold BBQ meat, which was about as good as anything I can make with ease. And I got the chopped pork sandwhich. Thinking this would be killer, what we really got was a pile of orange mush on wonder bread. Another odd thing was they simply put the food on plastic cafeteria trays. Not on a plate on a tray, but on the tray itself. It weirded me out for a while until I realized it is just as easy to sanitize that as a plate, but I have some kind of culinary bigotry going on.

However, its the CULTURE that really wowed us. A good siezed man (and I mean 6' 4", and pretty good shape, blue collar looking guy) gets a plate full of food. He gets up and walks out of the dining area into the hallway (Im assuming to the bathroom). The boys and I are eating (it was a BIG BOY trip, and Z hung the whole way), and all of a sudden the guy at the table next to us says "Man I think that guy picked up your food and walked out with it". We realize he is talking to the gentleman that went to wash his hands. I look at the guy and say "Youre kidding" and he says that hes pretty sure.

The boys look at me with some amusement, and my mind is swirling. The guy runs out of the front door, and 25 seconds later the 2 BIG boys from behind the BBQ Pit go racing out the door. The old man that cleans up the tables (we are talking about a man in his 70s probably) comes out with a triangle shaped spatula about the size of a cross section of cheddar cheese, and goes to the door.

Just at that point, blue collar man comes walking in with his food! We are all amazed, and we find out the guy took a bite of it before the guy could get it back. Im already thinking "if the pit man doesnt give him some food to replace it we GOT to take a collection and buy this guy some food after all that". Sure enough, they do the right thing.

And them Bryant, the programmer/genius from the hills of West Virginia says "They ought to make a commercial out of that. Its BBQ not only good enough to steal off a mans table, but its good enough to run him down and take it back!"

And then Zion just shrugged and kept eating his chopped Pig.

Baby Baby

Went for a run to vegas. Saw the BABY. My friends came to Vegas with a suitcase of cash, and are leaving with a life, a story, and an example of Gods intentions and power.

See, there is a mom out there that has a history that is painful, and rather predictable. Especially in Las Vegas. And somehow, she decided to forego killing her child, but stick it out and release this baby to the state in hopes that the baby would have something that even she probably didn't have.

As well there is a couple that have some babies. And yet God is stirring them to go beyond just their stance about "pro-life", and intentionally intervene. And all these factors come together in a special little dance that has really impacted me.

I actually got to hold her... I joked that I have cooked chickens bigger than this baby. She isn't underweight or anything, don't get me wrong. I just forget how little they are. I think that's so they come out better, and also for people to think they are cute to help them continue to take care of them. I didn't ever remember my babies looking that little!

She is little, and cute, just like she should be. And to me she represents the fruit of labor and work and redemption in a practical way that is pretty dramatic. I just want to party, and enjoy the whole thing.

But here is the twist... Underneath all this redemption is a system that I am finding out needs dramatic change. Serious Change. In fact, I would say it might be possible the whole process of adoption might need to be redeemed. I don't know if there is a better word. Here is a fancy attempt at metaphor....

We all walked down the Las Vegas Strip last night. I gorged on food, and navigated moving billboards of naked and seductive women (some men too) which have a lot less pull on me than ever before. We all KNOW it is wrong. But it is so saturating, it actually becomes less sensational quickly. And we stop and do one of my favorite things. We watch the fountains at Bellagio. At night, with the lights. And we wait until we see the softer music ones, where it makes the water look like dancing, and my emotions are all caught up in this. I think it is beautiful, and makes me think about heaven, and God, and creativity....

None of this would be possible without the money involved in gambling, and the parallel opportunities. There simply wouldnt be enough money to create a lake in the middle of the desert, and shoot off water if people werent going to lose money.

Some people think gambling is sin. I dont. I like it. It can be fun. Some people might think shopping is sin. I kind of do at times, especially with what and how and where some of these organizations present themselves, and what they tap into. I definitely think lust is sin, and perpetuating it is going to create incredible grief for people. Some people might think Las Vegas in sinful. I think it is a city. The people, and what they pursue, have been allowed to use it for their own purpose.

And yet out of all this, come these beautiful fountains, and things like the Cirque du Solieil. And communities of immigrants that come to America and work. But it isn’t worth it is it? Wouldn’t we rather have nothing there, because even though there is some beautiful things, the reason they exist is because of the desire and resources of sin, or at least the result of corruption?

I see something similar in the "adoption industry". I haven’t been through the process, and I dont know enough about it.....YET. But just simply watching and reading and hearing, Im sick. Because in my heart, I love the idea of redemption of something out of a bad situation, but the way it is handled is almost similar to the way Las Vegas runs. This whole process runs on money, and its mechanism is to exploit the needs on both ends for redemption, and connection.

I bet others would even have more to say. But I see a system that presents pretty fountains, and we all know that this is better than babies, and that most of the time something bad has happened for a baby to need to be given up. And yet underneath it is a sick and twisted thought process. How come it costs more $$ for a free, Caucasian baby? And that the more racially diverse the baby is, the more it costs compared to babies that are exclusively other than white?

My business mind tells me why. SUPPLY AND DEMAND. And demand creates voids and opportunities for profit centric systems to jump in and manipulate supply. If there is a demand for gambling, and lust, and hedonism, it is a matter of time before someone will jump in and supply it. And as they do, they can coat it with things that misconstrue and distract you even from your own desire for things.

We are actually talking about brokering. We are talking about commodities trading. I see nothing much different from an agency finding a woman distraught and afraid, and either ashamed enough or convicted enough not to want to kill a baby, and brokering her situation to the highest bidder. She/the baby is basically a future, and the price is negotiable!!!! How can a sale price be negotiable if the there isn’t a profit margin in this?

On the other side is a couple that for a few simple reasons wants to adopt these babies. Usually it is tied to the inability to have biological children and sometimes a conviction.(and soon I believe it will be volumes of people who can, but choose not to. Or, what if "barrenness" occurs in the church? All of a sudden, it isn’t uncommon for Christians to not have biological children. Bet we would think about it as a curse, and I would say what if it is a word from God to fulfill scriptures). So fairly well meaning people engage this process, and are told they need to go through hurdles and agencies and costs. And their ability to pay, and their willingness to sacrifice helps determine what they can get. And I dont have a value placed on drug free, Caucasian, etc... They are all lives and babies. One isnt better than another.

Both sides are caught in a place of need or desire, and both are manipulated for the purpose of making money, while the face of it is presented as this wonderful thing called adoption. And the pro life folks are excited because someone isn’t killing babies, which is GREAT, and yet there is a taste in my heart similar to when I go to Las Vegas.

The metaphor isn’t a great one, but it is me trying to get my head around what is going on.

I think it is time to assault the adoption industry. I would rather have it than not, but the costs, the gymnastics, and the premise of for profit companies brokering babies has got to be brought to an end.

It must be possible to jump into the market and apply similar processes, but with different motives, and therefore different results. When a market exists, and someone is selling the same product for less, with the same quality and delivery, they will erode the market until the market loses its ability to provide profit to anyone not capable of doing business the same way. Is it possible to create a matrix in which adoptions can be done, and only the actual costs are passed on to the buyer? And the supplier is motivated to work with the broker because of ease of business, and the ethos of the broker? How many birth mothers would prefer to work with an agency they KNEW wasn’t making money off them? Do they even KNOW that is happening?

I am going to do some research, and I am going to get some really smart people in the same room, and we are going to talk about this. Prayers are appreciated. There is something afoot.